It's been awhile since I last wrote anything. Days are going by like a flash. I can't keep up with everything that's going on around me. I definitely can't keep up with everything going on in the political envirnment here in the United States. On top of everything else, it's hurricane season here in the Southeast. I'm stressed to the max. It happens this way with hurricane season every year. I'm never able to fully prepare for evacuation. I never have enough money to put some away to pay for a motel somewhere. I have had to use my credit cards to buy groceries lately. I am having trouble with my bank. They are putting holds on all my mobile deposits for 7 business days, which total to 9 days. I need the money Nana pays me for groceries, and don't have access to it even though it has been deposited. It's driving me crazy inside. If there is one thing I aim to do, it is to pay the bills on time and keep groceries in the house. This bank situation makes it that much harder on me.
Caleb tore through the house looking for a computer charging cable and now the house is in worse condition than it was before. Nothing is where it belongs. So much stuff is on the floor that it is hard for me to get around. It is dangerous because both doorways are blocked in a a way that I cannot get the wheelchair out with Nana in it in case of an emergency.
It has been so hot that I want ice cream frequently. It's not the no sugar added ice cream either. It's the Breyer's Cookies and Cream ice cream which I have found to be a comfort food. It brings me back to the days that my dad took Mathew and me to Dairy Queen. I miss my dad and my brother so much. My dad passed away about 3 years ago. Mathew is still alive as far as I know, but he doesn't talk to me anymore since the first term of Trump when he supported him and I had things to write about it.
The heat is so bad during the day that it is hard for me to get any work done. When I do get work done, it is normally later in the day to clean the kitchen and cook dinner. I was able to buy a portable air conditioner to replace the window unit that is literally falling apart, but when Caleb plugged it in, he did not fully put it together. It overfilled with water, and flooded where it was standing. He had to remove the portable sir conditioner and put it outside to clean up the water. So we are not getting use out of it right now. It has to be drained and properly put together before we can plug it in again. We need to find the manual that came with it, and all the parts. We can't do that now because everything where it was unboxed is now in a huge pile of stuff that belongs to the air conditioner and stuff Caleb pulled apart looking for his computer charging cable. It's not going to be easy to clean up the living room, but I am going to try today.
The laundy room is worse than it was before too. Caleb took apart storage boxes and just put everything on the floor, without putting things back where he found them. I can't reach the washing machine nor dryer right now, and there is a mountain of laundry to be washed. I can hardly get to the back door to let the dogs outside.
I have been getting soaked in my own sweat while washing dishes and cooking at night. Dinner is happening later everyday. Usually I would start around 1630, but not anymore. Now we are not getting our dinner served until after my 1900 alarm. I am going to bed soaked in my own sweat because I don't have the energy to take a shower after working in the kitchen every night. I just dry off by laying on my bed in front of my portable air conditioner in my bedroom.
Yesterday was the 4th of July. We did not do anything to celebrate at all. No fireworks, no barbeque, nothing. I did happen to go to Walmart and buy some groceries. I wanted ice cream and to get some regular groceries that Nana needs. I had a credit card that I used. Thank God, because I don't have access to the money she gave me by check. I don't have much anymore. I spent just under $100 yesterday. I hope what I bought lasts until the check's hold is removed.
I had a strange thing happen to me the other day as I was eating ice cream in my bedroom the other night. I was lying in my bed with Bella next to me, and I noticed movement on the floor next to my bed under my night stand table. There was light coming from somewhere and a shadow was moving. I watched it to see if I could investigate further. The light didn't have a source. I looked everywhere. At first I thought maybe it came from the hallway, but that was not true. Then I thought the only other way the light could shine in the direction it was, was if it came from under my bed. It was strange. The shadow was moving, even when I was sitting perfectly still. Bella was not moving. The shadow looked like it could have been me eating my ice cream. I stopped eating my ice cream, but the shadow kept moving like a spoon to a mouth quickly. I couldn't figure it out. I got up to make sure no one was under my bed. I thought maybe Caleb was hiding or something. No one was there. There was no light coming from under my bed. The light had no source, and neither did the shadow I was witnessing. After having enough, and coming to the realization it was from another source, I called on my spiritual protectors: Jesus, Jehovah, Archangel Micheal, Mother Mary, and Mary Magdalene to guide and protect me. I thought fiercely, "In Jesus' name, be gone!" And the light and the shadow were gone. There was nothing but darkness under my nightstand table, like normal. And so it was....
Yesterday something happened. Caleb was in his room resting, and I was in my room trying to rest. Nana was in her room resting. I was in a relaxed state with Bella in bed with me, but my lower back and pelvis were hurting. I thought I might have some privacy and be able to masturbate, but then it happened. Caleb came into my room the first time, and I was able to act like I wasn't doing anything but resting. He left with no knowledge. I thought I was ok to finish, but then Caleb comes into my room again asking, "Mom, are you ok?" I responded with, "Get out of here! I'm trying to masturbate!" LOL Oh man! Ugh. I have no privacy in my own house. Thank God he didn't see what I was doing because I was under my blanket. Still, it was embarrassing and frustrating at the same time. Later I talked to him about how I need my privacy too. It old him I'm only human, and masturbation is a good way to relieve stress. He didn't have anything to say and that was the end of it, or so he thought. When he knocked on Nana's door while I was in with her talking to her, I yelled, "Get out of here! We are masturbating!" Just to relieve the tension. I laughed so loudly and so hard! I told him he could come in. He was disgusted. I got him good. Nana reinforced that he doesn't have to worry about that ever happening because she is Catholic, and there are some things you just don't do, like masturbate with your step-daughter.
Earlier yesterday I got Caleb good too. I told him after he was cuddling with Bella, that he had poop on his face! He believed me and got freaked out. He was asking where it was, and I resisted telling him. Then I told him, it was on his upper lip, so he starts wiping his face and his upper lip. I said, "Why would you wipe where the poop is with your hand?" And he got more upset. I couldn't stop laughing, Then I told him, "Oh! That was just your mustache!" He wanted to really get me back, so he mooned me, and sat with his bare butt on my lap. I spanked him hard. Oh man!
We also had a more serious incident happen where Caleb's account was breached and someone bought a game. I had to report ait with my bank, and now I have to get a new credit card. It sucks because that credit card had money on it for me to use for groceries, and now I don't have access to it until I get the new card. Thank God the unauthorized charge was only $6.99, and not the total available balance.
I'm getting tired again. It's only 0436 now. I have been awake for about an hour or so. I still have time to sleep. I have alot of work to do, so I better go rest.
Thank you for reading! Keep us in your prayers! Have a blessed day!
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