Almost there

     It is now 0415 on Thursday morning, so let's catch up. Yesterday was a busy day. We delivered nana's urine sample to the lab, went to Walmart to buy drinks, then to the gas station to fill up the tank, then to CVS to return something, and finally back home. It took all morning to do all of that. I came home, ate some Swiss cheese for lunch, and went to take a nap. I could not work anymore throughout the day. I was sleepy for the rest of the day. I did not even cook dinner. I made myself a sandwich, took my meds, and went to bed.

    Tuesday morning we took nana to have her labs done. On the way back home, we went to look at the ocean and the intracoastal waterway at the Veterans' Park. Once home I needed a nap. When I got back up, I wanted to go to Food Lion, so Caleb and I went. I bought some chicken thighs and a bone-in picnic pork roast on sale. I only went to buy lettuce, tomatoes, and sweet potatoes. I came home and made bacon in the oven to make blt's. That's what we had for dinner. 

    Monday morning is not clear in my memory. I know at some point we changed nana's mattress protector and sheet. I know at some point I began organizing the living room. I bought storage containers with lids to be able to store things like drinks and dog food out of sight. I made good progress, but I am nowhere near done. Caleb has to clean up his area. I have all our Thanksgiving ingredients in one storage container. I was able to get most of the groceries put away and the empty reusable bags in one bag. 

    At some point I checked the 9 cube storage unit and cleared a way for me to put it where I wanted it. I then put the foldable boxes in the unit, organized how I wanted it. 

    I think over the weekend I washed some dishes, and fully loaded the dishwasher and ran it. I know I was trying to clean the kitchen as much as possible so I could spray for bugs using this new spray I just bought, bugMD. I haven't gotten that far yet. I still have cleaning to do. 

    I only have another week before the social worker comes back to take progress photos. I have been doing alot of running around and have not been home long enough for me to make the progress I want. 

    I've also been dealing with my bank about the fraud that occurred that ended with me getting scammed. 

    I am hoping that today I am full of energy to clean because I also have pool therapy with Nick this afternoon. It's going to be a long day. I think I will cook the pork picnic in the slow cooker so I do not have to worry about making dinner tonight. 

    Tuesday was municipal election day. I did not vote like I wanted to. I was too tired.

    Friday is Veterans' Day observed. Saturday is Veterans' Day. I don't have plans as of yet, because I expect I will be too tired to go anywhere.

    I miss my dad. I want to visit his grave and sit with him. I just want to cry it all out. I think I will in December.

    Mike has not been well lately. He was sick all last week, and got worse over the weekend. He went to the ER in the middle of the night Sunday night. All they could tell him was he has a virus. Looks like Mike and I will be leaving eachother soon. He has to move to Denver to take care of his dad. The way he talks, he does not want to continue dating me. 

    Here I was hoping that he would spend Thanksgiving with us. Nana and I made all these preparations to have a guest over. 

    I guess that's the way life goes sometimes. 

    I had an appointment with Larisa Gosla last week. It went well. I have been given an additional 2 months to thoroughly go through the material because I will be tested before I am certified in Vocal Resonance Method.

    I am just trying to find my way out of the mess I created. I got scammed and lost $500 that I could not afford to lose. Some of my bills are unpaid because of it. I am praying fervently for help from Jehovah. 

    There is just so much pressure to do so many things all at once. I need everything done to completion right away. I can't move as fast as I need to in order to make that happen. I am slow moving. Time is moving faster it seems. The day ends before I get my list of things done. I'm always exhausted by the end of the day.

    I found a full scholarship for veterans who study in STEM degrees. I thought I could go back to school one day that way. I can never go back to school because I will never be able to work again. I feel so defeated. I know I can do it. 

    I just ordered my second batch of Kratomade. I can't work without it. It takes all my pains away in the morning and lasts until about lunch time. It's the only way I can clean my house. I can't do anything with all this chronic pain. I am selling Kratomade now. If you are interested, email me at jennifer_demello@healinergy.com

    I am sleeping better when I take a hit of delta-8 before trying to sleep. I wake up fewer times in the night, and have better chances of waking up feeling like I had a good night's sleep. Without it, I wake up every 2 hours. I'm tired when I wake up because I have not had sufficient sleep. I am an affiliate to Mellow Fellow now. If you are interested, see my affiliate page on my website, www.healinergy.com

    During my day I am using hape'. I use it to become more grounded and able to think more clearly. I use the strongest one that Four Visions Market has. I am an affiliate with them too because I use their products. Check out my affiliate page on my website.

     So, I am proud that nana and I made it to taking her to get her labs done. We both have such problems going places, it can be hard to sync up. We finally did it, and I made her follow up appointment yesterday. 

    I need to keep the laundry going in the background. I tend to forget about it. 

    Caleb was vomiting his medications for 2 days in a row. He said it was his multi-vitamin causing him to vomit, so I had to stop giving it to him. It's unfortunate because this was not always the case. He use to be able to take them as long as they were separate from his other medications. I have to find a gummy for men, because he is growing so fast and is not a little boy anymore.

    If I can afford to, I will send Christinia and Rachel care packages of the excess stuff I have around the house. I am trying to declutter the house, and they need some of this stuff I have. 

    I finally got rid of the bag of canned goods by giving it away to Jessica. I was clearing out the pantry to remove food we don't eat. I did not want to throw away good food.

    My business was mentioned by the UNCW Alumni Association for Veterans' Day!

    Bella was throwing up too. I think it was because she was drinking out of the toilet.

    I've got to find a single bottled water to take my Kratomade this morning. It's getting late. It's already 0512. 

    I got my Kratomade down. Now I need to get a gallon of water to be able to make my Gatorade zero so I can take my medications and supplements.

    I don't know how today is going to go. I got up around 0300 or so and have been awake all this time. I guess I could go ahead and start the pork picnic in the slow cooker. I'm going to cook it for 8 hours on low.

    I need to get this house cleaned up. I can only do so much in a day though. I need Caleb's help. He is resistant to anything I have to say. His ODD is getting him into trouble. I wish there was an easy around it, but he has to learn the hard way. It can be as simple as cleaning the kitchen trash can, and well, look what happened. I had to call the police and EMS. 

    What sucks is that the excitement of Mike spending the holidays with us was taking away the pain of not having my dad here. 

    I am just going to have to rewatch the Vocal Resonance Method classes and take notes. There is just no way for me to remember everything. 

    Once I get out of this situation with DSS, I will have time to devote to my other classes. I am going to study to become a Yoga therapist. I have even more than that that I want to do.

    I have to get Caleb to study. I don't know why he struggles so much with simple instructions. I know he is delayed, but how do I get through to him? He has Autism Spectrum Disorder, ADHD, and ODD. Being the mom, is like being a villain to him. There is always an argument. I am always wrong in his eyes. It's like, I'm mom! I'm not always wrong! I have 40 years of life experience behind me! What more does this kid need?

    I am getting support from his therapist to take away his computers that he is always on. He likes to watch youtube videos of gamers. I don't get why. It's such a waste of time. I can't get him to read a book if his life depended on it. I have all these books that I have collected, just gathering dust on the shelves. 

    I'm starting to feel like I should wake Caleb up to get my gallon of water so I can take my meds. It's still kinda early, but I'm up and I want to take them already.

    Thank you for reading, and have a blessed day!