What just happened

     It is now 0313 and I am awake. My back hurts and I was hungry and thirsty. I took a Methocarbamol pill just now. It is my second dose so far. It's my new medication for my back pain.

    A few days ago I was taken to the emergency room due to being unresponsive. Caleb said I looked like I might be having a stroke. What happened was that I woke up around 0200 and had a second delta-9 gummy. I waited, and felt no relief, and decided to have more gummies than I should have at one time. I ate 1 opened bag, and 1 unopened bag of 20 ct. delta-9 thc gummies, and it hit me all at once. It waws way too strong. I don't remember what happened at all. I remember waking up at the emergency room, and wondering why I was there. I guess I really scared Caleb and Nana. That wasn't my intention. I was having back and pelvis pain when I woke up that morning. I wanted to go back to sleep too. I had a couple of gummies then something took over me and I didn't care that I kept eating the gummies. I wanted the candy too badly. 

    I am feeling somewhat better now. It has been a couple of days. My back still hurts. I was soo thirsty! I won't be doing that again. 

    I thought I had a lot to say, but I guess I don't. My pain is unbearable. I went to the doctor at the VA last week for it because of the time I had last Saturday. I was in bed most of the day in pain. Dr. Thomas is taking over for Dr. Fuchs while she is out having a baby. She prescribed me the Methocarbamol muscle relaxer for the muscle spasms she witnessed when doing my exam. I hope it takes care of all the pain so I can get to cleaning and organizing my home. 

    The department of Social Services was notified for the delta-9 incident and the conditions of the home. They were already involved due to the reports made late last year. 

    Caleb is almost done with this school year. His last day is the 29th.

    Caleb is doing ok now that I am back home. He was really worried.

    I've been thinking about how to stretch the money I make to last the whole month. It never works out. I never have enough for gas and groceries. I am able to pay my bills, but not have any in savings. I need 2 more reviews to be listed on heal.me. I need to get 2 other people to try my reiki sessions. 

    I am praying to get approved for all my VA claims to end in me getting Aid and Attendance. 

    It feels like the days are so short. I never get everything done that I want to get done without exhausting myself. I was exhausted when I took the gummies. I had 3 appointments the day before I woke up at 2am, and had done errand running. It's alot for me. I have Autism and am very sensitive. I tire easily because I am sensitive to everything. My pain never ceases. 

    Today is Sunday. Yesterday I rested for most of the day. Today I have to get laundry washed and clean up Caleb's room. 

    There is so much going on. I missed my first therapist appointment on Thursday. Caleb is almost done with the school year. We have Caleb in therapy and we have DSS involved. I am trying to make it to all my appointments. I'm dealing with chronic debilitating pains. I am trying to run the house without being healthy first. I am pushing through my pains to try to clean as much as I can every day. I will be glad when we no longer have to wake up at 0530 on the weekdays for Summer break. 

    Caleb's teachers bought him a pair of new shoes. It was really sweet of them. 

    Bella and Bubba got into a fight over dinner the other day. They have never fought before. Caleb broke them up, and got hurt in the process. He just has a scar on his leg from it. 

    I have been reaching out to Nigel more frequently lately. I'm tired of being alone. I want a life partner so badly. I would feel more secure if I had a life partner. 

    I have been feeling like everything is a battle I am fighting. I am fighting within my own body just to be. The pain is too much to deal with. It's nearly impossible to get things done. I was frustrated by the pain and inability to stay asleep. I felt the muscle spasms while I was lying in bed. It felt like the bed was moving because Bella was there, but she wasn't. 

    I am hoping for better days to come. I am hoping this new medication makes it easier to live and get things done. It was really driving me nuts that I can't do what I need to do to get out of DSS involvement. 

    Well, I'm going back to bed. It is only 0424 now and still dark outside. 

    Thank you for reading! Keep us in your prayers! Have a blessed day!