Tuesday, February 2, 2021

5 Year Journal Day 249

      Today's prompt is "Today you learned ____." Today I learned that I might be able to afford to move closer to my Aunt Lisa.

     Today is Tuesday, February 2, 2021. It is 12:18 p.m. I know, it's amazing, right? I'm blogging during the day time. Well, I got sick last night, and was vomiting while I was driving home from Wilmington. Let's take a few steps back. Actually, let's go back to Sunday night. I had a bad health night. I had gas coming up, I had gas going down. I vomited in my mouth. I have chronic conditions that can have these kind of effects on me, so I just went to rest, and didn't give it another thought. 

     Monday morning I woke up and took my glucose. I did my morning routine , and gave Caleb his medications. I was feeling antsy, like I needed to go out of the house and do something. I was feeling stir crazy. I thought of what I could do and what I needed to do. I figured I would go to Harris Teeter in Leland, about 40 minutes away, to get their stew beef meat on sale BOGO free. I love their stew beef meat, and it is my preferred meat to cook with. The last day of the sale is Tuesday, and I knew I had to take Caleb to 2 appointments in Shallotte on Tuesday afternoon, and would not want to drive in the opposite direction to go get the meats. So, it was decided, we were going to go out and buy the meat on sale. 

     Before we left, Billy got in contact with me. His aunt died the night before, and he needed to get clothes to wear to the funeral. I was planning on driving towards Wilmington anyway, so I agreed to take him where he needed to go. Caleb and I drove to Wilmington, and got there after 2p.m. We picked Billy up, and took him to pick up his check. Then we went to Walmart. Caleb said he was hungry, so I was going to buy a snack for us from within. Upon entering the Walmart, I saw a sign for the specials at the Checkers fast food restaurant right there. I decided to get us some sandwiches from there. Caleb and I ordered the 2 doubles for 5 deal. Caleb had a double cheeseburger, and a double fish sandwich. I had a double chicken sandwich, and a double fish sandwich. I thought it was good. I was feeling kind of strange before eating. I felt like a dropping sensation within my core. I figured it might be to due to low blood sugar. 

     Caleb ate half of each of his sandwiches, but he did not like them because they had mayo on them. I ate all my food. Billy goes to Walmart to cash his checks. Anyway, after we finished there, we walked back to the van. Caleb and I waited for Billy to finish doing what he needed to do. Then we drove him TJ Maxx to buy clothes for the funeral. He came out to the van with all this bullshit that had nothing to do with going to the funeral. I was getting hot from waiting in the van. It was gray and gloomy outside. The sun was not out. I had the temperature set to 60 something for Caleb to stay warm. My face was getting bright red. I was getting tired of being there. I waited for Billy, and was losing my patience. He had gone and ordered wings to pick up on his way out of the store. TJ Maxx is on a strip mall. Anyway, he brings his shit to the van, and then goes to pick up his wings. 

     After that, he needed to go to the bank. After the bank, he needed to meet up with "Nikki", whose legal name is Amber Alease Duncan. Anyway, that was irritating because she is ... well, not my type of people, let's say that. I don't want to be around her. Then I took him to Food Lion to buy some groceries. I could not wait to leave Wilmington. It was getting late, and getting darker. He knows I do not like to drive at night. Some bullshit that I had to drive home in the dark. 

     I stopped at Harris Teeter on the way home and grabbed my meats and some veggies. I just bought enough to get me through the week, without buying alot of stuff. I am waiting for the Pandemic EBT deposit to get the rest of my groceries that we need. I did not want to spend all my cash. 

     I was not feeling the greatest. I noticed that I was still too hot, even with the air conditioning back on. We got to one of the back roads , away from Highway 17, on the way home and I almost hit a small deer that was crossing the road! OMG! It was raining and dark, and I did not see it until I was right there in front of it! About 15-20 minutes later down the road, there I am getting nauseous and watery mouthed. We are less than 10 minutes from home, and I am vomiting in my shirt and driving in the rain and dark. Caleb screamed "Pull over!" but I couldn't manage to pull over right away. I scared the shit out of him, I'm sure. Once I started vomiting, I couldn't stop. My eyes were on driving, and I pulled over as far to the right as I could. I was still on the road. There was no traffic, thank God for that. My shirt was soaked, but at least I managed to not vomit on the Mazda. I felt so sick. We drove home, and I slowly got out of the Mazda. I felt the liquid and chinks fall from my chest to the ground as I opened up my shirt from the bottom. Caleb was totally grossed out. 

     Caleb walked me to the back door and told me to take my dirty clothes off outside, so we didn't have to smell the funk inside the house. It had stopped raining. I took off my shirt and shook out the chunks. I took off my bra and let the liquid fall from my chest. Caleb walked me to the shower, so I could wash off. He turned the water temperature to warm, and not scolding hot, or freezing cold. I undressed the rest of my clothes, and got in and washed off. 

     After washing off I went right to my bed and laid down to dry off. It didn't take long for me to get up and throw some clean clothes on. I was going to just go to sleep, but Caleb kept me up. I didn't trust that I could take all my night time medications and not have any problems. I did not trust that I could eat food which is a pre-requisite to taking my night time medications. I spoke to my Aunt Lisa on the phone for a little while, and decided that I was ready to try to eat a little something. I went out to the kitchen and realized that there was nothing to snack on in the pantry, in the fridge, nor in the freezer. Ugh. Luckily I bought some low carb tortillas from Harris Teeter while there, and I thought I would just eat that with a little low fat cottage cheese. It was ok, not bad. 

     I went back to bed. I still did not trust to take my medications, but did not want to give up hope on being able to take them because my diabetes medications are included in the lot. I went to bed for a couple hours and got back up again, hungry. This time I decided to try ham and Swiss cheese tortilla roll up. It was good and heavier than the snack before. I ate enough to be able to stomach all the pills I normally take at night with dinner, so I went ahead and took them. I went back to bed, and did not get back up until Caleb woke me up early this morning. He wanted me to give him screen time on his phone. He then wanted to make some fish fillets in the oven. He wanted to see me eat. So I was up for about 30 minutes. I went back to sleep after I ate though. It was too early for me to be up.

     I finally got out of bed around 8, I think. I was feeling fine, not queasy or anything, so I did my normal morning routine. I took my glucose, and had to take my iron pill and orange juice close to when I ate breakfast because I did not get up without eating during the night/morning hours. 

     It is now 4:28 p.m. I got pulled away for drama that has nothing to do with me happening next door, at Billy's house. Anyway, I just got back from Walmart grocery shopping. I did not get my EBT deposit like I hoped, but did not want to wait any longer to get food into the house. I ended up having to pay on a credit card to buy groceries, because I did not have enough cash to pay the total due. Sucks. 

     After waking up this morning, I called Caleb's psychiatrist's and therapist's office to find out how to handle his appointments he had today. I did not want to expose them to whatever was making me sick. It was decided that we would a doxy.me online video call appointment. 

     Anyway, he had both his appointments online this afternoon. They both went well. That was really all we were scheduled to do today. I wanted to get some laundry done and just be at home. I was not sure if I could get moving to clean the kitchen, although it desperately needs it.

     I got Caleb to unload the dishwasher and put away the dishes in the strainer yesterday. I might be able to pull myself together and straighten up the kitchen a little bit. I have to put the groceries away. Caleb brought them in the house without argument, so that was nice. 

     Billy is trying to drag me into helping him move his stuff out of his house, and I really don't want to be a part of it. He wants me to drive all the way there, and pick him up, drive all the way back here with him and get a Uhaul truck. Then he wants me to drive the Uhaul truck to his house. After he loads the truck, he wants me to drive it somewhere in Wilmington. I guess I would then drop him off? And return the truck back here? That's alot of back and forth to Wilmington and I'm not having that. It's like he doesn't even care that I got sick after being around him all afternoon yesterday. Fuck that. I just did everything he needed to do, to the point that I had to drive home at night in the dark and rain for an hour, and he didn't even give me a whole $20 for gas. 

     His accountant told him he had this week to get his stuff out of his house, and he has 2 weeks to get his car. I guess the house is being sold all of a sudden. Anyway, I'm done. I'm finished. I am worth better treatment. 

     So the drama from today is that Billy's accountant had people come to Billy's house to clear it out today! That's fucked up. How are you going to say he has a week and not even give him a whole day before paying someone to clear his shit out of the house? I never liked Jay B. Maready. He is the shadiest person I know who works in the accounting field. 

     I let Billy know people were at his house taking shit to the dump. I don't know how he is paying Jay to be his accountant and yet, Billy is not the one making the decisions. 

     Not my circus. Not my monkeys.

     Anyway, I guess I should get to work or something around here. The laundry needs to be done, and the kitchen cleaned. I really need to clean the bathroom at some point in the near future. 

     Oh! I don't think I wrote about my weigh in on Monday. I am almost down a whole 20lbs! Alost! Sooo close! Woop woop!

     One more thing before I go, I am almost done with the 6mg/mL nicotine e-juice. I will likely finish it today. The next bottle is going to be 3mg/mL nicotine. Sooo.... Here we go! I hope I don't lose my mind! I want to quit! I want to quit! I want to quit! Let it be so!

     It is 4:57 p.m. and I have a little get up and go to get a little bit of stuff done today.  

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