It has been a few days since my last post. It is now 0357 and I have been awake for a few minutes. I left for Lumberton on Tuesday after trying to clean up a bit so I would not come home to bugs in the house. We got there and went to eat at Outback with my dad. We had a good time. On Wednesday I was planning to see Lella in Fayetteville for lunch to meet her and her kids. She never told me what time to meet her, but then she went to Zaxby's and said she was there. I had not left Lumberton yet and had to make it to my CPAP appointment. We ended up missing each other. I made it to the Reford Road VA Clinic where my appointment was. I ended up chatting with a veteran in the waiting area. She was sitting close to me, so I struck up a conversation with her. It was validating to have a conversation with another veteran.
I got my CPAP replaced with a newer model. The appointment did not require much. The person helping me was nice. I went back to the van and we left to go eat at Zorba's Greek restaurant. I love gyros. Oh! We had IHOP for breakfast.
On Thursday we had Denny's for breakfast. I wanted to train my dad and Dona Sharon to level 1 Reiki so we stayed an extra day. I ended up taking Dona Sharon to the license plate agency and helping my dad have his car towed. I was having panic attack symptoms that had no cause. I could not teach like that. We had Jersey Mike's for lunch/dinner.
On Friday we had Waffle House for breakfast then came back to pack. We left the room a mess of dog pee and poop. We did our best to get the pee up with towels, but Caleb had nothing to pick the poop up with.
While we were there Caleb saw a rat in the vent in the bathroom.
We got home just in time for me to get ready for my appointment with Dr. Kent for my diabetes medication review. The Wifi needed to be restarted. I could not access my Virta app to create the spreadsheet I normally send to Dr. Kent. I could not access the internet on my computer either. Dr. Kent called and I was unprepared. I asked to schedule another appointment in a month due to technical problems.
Friday night someone banged at our door around 9pm. We did not answer the door. The person jumped the fence and banged on the back door. Caleb was scared so I called 9-1-1. The police came and did not find anyone around the house. The shed was open.
Yesterday was Saturday. I had Revelation Breathwork Facilitator class from noon to 7:30pm. Before I could finish class, around 6:20pm or so, someone reached their hand in the window of Christinia's old room. I called the police. They did not find the person.
I called my dad but he was too tired to hear me out so I talked to Dona Sharon. She helped me calm myself by letting me talk to her. I was not able to finish the class.
The class continues today at noon. Hopefully there will be no more problems with that person who keeps coming over here.
I just got sidetracked doing some shopping. Did a little bit of Christmas shopping while it was on my mind, before I forget what my intentions were.
I need to take my medications and supplements. BRB.
I just ordered some business supplies from vistaprint. I ordered some dog supplies for my fur babies too.
Today I have class starting at noon. The replay is not up yet from yesterday, so I can't catch up on what I missed. I had to leave real quick and in a hurry to call the police last night. I was about to start facilitating breathwork for my partner who just facilitated my breathwork session. I feel bad for having to leave like that.
I have to clean out the Mazda at some point this week. It stinks. I have to clean out the fridge before tonight too to make sure the bad food gets out in the trash.
I made it home in enough time to go pay the water bill on Friday so that's done. We also went to Amsterdam Life to pick up some Delta blend gummies to try for pain. Then we went to Food Lion so Caleb could buy some food. He wanted to buy a money card for his XBox with the money he got from his papa. I bought some salad ingredients thinking the salad ingredients in the fridge probably weren't good anymore. I'm not sure. I haven't checked yet. It seems like everything is happening so fast that I haven't had time to recover from the trip before I had to start working.
Caleb put up the new Christmas lights on the tree yesterday. They are pretty.
Caleb broke down the door to Christinia's old room the other night. I think it was Friday night. He thought someone was in there.
I tried to unlock the gate last night but I could not find the key to the lock. The keys I tried did not want to go in the lock.
We ordered Domino's Friday night. I ate a lot of brownies. I need to get back on my diet before I start gaining weight.
The house is a disaster area. I need Caleb to help me clean up. I can't do everything without him because he is the reason it got like that in the first place. I need his help to clean up because the job is massive and overwhelming. I need his help because I need him to stop doing things that cause this sort of chaos in the house. I need him to clean up after himself and follow my instructions when I tell him to do something. When I say "Take out the trash", I do not mean take it out of the trash can and leave it in the living room, for example. I mean take it out of the house and put it into the trash bin outside. This is frustrating the Hell out of me. I hate living like this.
Thanksgiving is next week. I'm not going to do anything special. I told my dad that our visit was like Veterans Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas wrapped into one. I gave both my dad and Dona Sharon those neck massagers for Christmas. I have to remind the to use them.
When I was talking to a classmate yesterday, I wondered if my no-reason panic attack symptoms were caused by what my future held with the person banging on the door and the police calls. I was calm when dealing with the Friday night. Saturday night I went outside with an aluminum baseball bat to beat this person's head in. I refuse to be this person's victim. I refuse to live scared in my own house. My neighbors know about what has happened here. Chris, the next-door neighbor, says to call him after calling the police next time.
I love spending time with Maura and Jason from Revelation Breathwork. I wish I could schedule more time with them. My schedule has been so off lately that I can't keep up with basic needs. I am late for my shower, for instance. I am ripe! I bought a bunch of those Bravo Sierra antibacterial body wipes to help me get through the time between showers but still.
I had a weird reaction to being over there in Lumberton. I woke up with back pain, which I assumed was because of the mattress. I had a full dump in the toilet each morning I was there. I could not believe my regularity! I struggle with chronic constipation so it was weird. I even let out a few blood clots from my period. I have not had a full period in more than a year! So that was strange too.
I love my dogs. They love to cuddle in bed with us. Strangely they have not barked when we were dealing with the banging on the doors. They were in bed with me at the time. Maybe they did not hear it? I was already in bed when it happened. I got up, of course. Caleb was scared.
I asked Caleb all day today to clear a path from the front door to the screen door to make it easy to get out of the house in case we needed to in a hurry. This boy resists work at all costs. He did not do a single thing while I was in my class. It would have taken maybe 15 minutes to clean up those broken down boxes that are on the floor on the porch.
I feel like now I have to carry a weapon in my own house. It's really ridiculous.
If I didn't have class today, I would be cleaning the house up. I've been asking Caleb to get the laundry moving. I don't know if he has been or not. We have many blankets that need to be washed.
The door knob on the shed is broken. I don't know how that happened. Caleb went out there and tried to put some 550 cord to keep it closed. Then last night the shed was open again! WTF?!
I don't know what this person wants or why they keep coming here. As far as I know, I do not have any enemies. Whoever this is, is not in their right mind. I don't know if it's drugs or what, but I'm guessing it is drugs. He/she came to the wrong house. I don't have drugs. I don't have money. I barely have food. I give food freely to those in need when I see them. Why is this person behaving like that?
Clearly he/she doesn't know me well enough to call me on my phone. It's a stranger. Why my house? I can't think of anyone who would be acting this way. If they want food or whatever, he/she is going about it the wrong way. Somebody is going to get hurt if this continues. It won't be me, Caleb, or my dogs. Just putting that out in the universe.
I went ahead and asked to cover myself, my family, my house, my vehicles, and my property in protection. I am secure that I am being divinely supported.
So, I have class from noon until 1930 tonight. Hopefully there won't be any distractions or police calls. Tuesday I have a 1-on-1 appointment with Jason from Revelation Breathwork. Wednesday I have an in-person appointment at the VA Women's Clinic in Wilmington. I also have my appointment with Jana Carrey at 1700. Thursday is Thanksgiving. That's all that we have going on the week. I will not be working with Brandi this week again because I have that appointment with Jason on Tuesday morning and because of the holiday. I have to remember to contact her and let her know.
It is now 0633 and I am just thinking. I need a shower. I would feel better if I washed up and changed my clothes. I don't know if I have any more far infrared compression tank tops to wear though. That sucks. I really like how they feel. I bought more but they haven't arrived yet.
I did decide to buy a Healthyline chakra light therapy mat the other day. It arrived last night. I can't wait to set it up and try it.
There's so much to do right now. I wish I had someone I could ask for help to get my house back in order.
Have a blessed day, and thank you for reading!
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