Today is Tuesday, and I have an appointment with my primary care provider at the VA Wilmington Women's Clinic this afternoon. Carly is coming over to the house today to help me clean up this morning. I have not been able to make progress on the laundry while she was away. I just can't seem to get back on track. I'm just so tired.
Last night Caleb kept waking me up because he couldn't sleep. I told him that I have to drive today and needed my rest so he would let me sleep.
Yesterday I made my crockpot dinner of chuck roast with vegetables. It turned out good, and I am happy to be back on my diet. Yesterday morning Caleb made pierogies in the air fryer, and I had a lot of them with sour cream. Later on, I had rice with my collard greens that I made with ham, Vidalia onion, bacon fat, and seasoning. The foods I ate caused my blood glucose to rise to 255. I decided I needed to go to Food Lion and walk around to bring it back down. Before I left, I took 1 Metformin pill. Caleb and I went grocery shopping together, and I bought what we wanted. We came home, and my blood glucose had only dropped to 227. It was worth a try to walk around the store though. I just want to go to bed when my sugar is high and sleep. I fought the urge to spend all day in bed and went out instead so I could cook the dinner I wanted.
I talked with Dona Sharon for a while when we came back home. Caleb bought her seaweed crisps, and I bought her fresh cherries. I wish I could remember our conversations to write about them. I am freer with what I say and do these days. I've grown a lot just in the past 12 months.
I already took my medications and supplements this morning. I gave Caleb his medications too. Yesterday I bought MyID medical tags for us in case of an emergency.
So, I am going to meet my new doctor this afternoon. I hope we get along and communication is easy between us. I know we are going to talk about my Virta renewal request.
I need help breaking down the boxes we have collected on the porch because both Jonathan and Chris are going to haul away trash for us soon. I need help getting the laundry done too.
I'm going to take a shower this morning and feel better. I'm so tired and exhausted. I'm fighting the urge to stay in bed all day and all night every day.
Caleb is going to take Bella for a walk.
I made a bag of crystals for Dona Sharon yesterday. I gave both Caleb and Dona Sharon a Sodalite bracelet to ward off nightmares.
I bought 2 new pairs of orthopedic walking shoes yesterday. I can't wait to try them! I'm so excited about getting healthy.
I decreased the amount of Diet Mountain Dew I bought at the grocery store. I am trying to wean myself off soda because it doesn't help with my anxiety. It makes it worse.
I bought a lot of reusable gallon water jugs and started drinking from one yesterday. Dona Sharon couldn't believe I drank a whole gallon in just a few hours. Yep. I get thirsty. Some of the water jugs are for the alkaline water that I create from tap water in my water filtration tanks. Some of the jugs are for sugar-free sweet tea that I am going to make by the gallon at home with filtered water. I bought the gallon-size tea bags and sweetener to do that yesterday. Some of the jugs are to make Gatorade Zero in from the powder with filtered water. By doing all this, I save not only money, but I help decrease my plastic waste. We only have 1 recycling bin, and oftentimes, it gets full before we are done recycling. It only gets picked up every other week, so we are forced to throw away recyclables, so they don't pile up.
I am looking for a 3-drawer medium-sized dresser/nightstand for the guest room.
We are going to put the shower chair to use once we clean it. I got it prescribed through the VA and did not feel safe on it, so I was going to discard it. Dona Sharon can use it to shower though, since she has trouble with standing long enough to shower. It's painful for her because of her knees and back.
We did not do much of anything for New Year's Eve. I bought Caleb his cake. We ordered pizza for lunch/dinner. I was just too tired all day. I spent most of the day in bed. My body was sore all over. I am trying to get a grip on my fibromyalgia by taking supplements that help calm my body down so I don't suffer as many flare-ups. I think it is working, but I have to take so many different things to try to support me right now. I have so many responsibilities and am in charge of so much right now. I have not even been blogging as often as I use to. I have not been marketing my business either. I have been so focused on my dad's "out-processing" and Dona Sharon's "in-processing" to my home with the move here, that I have had little time or energy to do other things. I had the plumber over here. I had the termite inspection. I had the VA appraisal. I missed classes and seminars. I am just trying to do what I absolutely need to do right now. I have hired help to clean up the house because I can't do everything by myself anymore. I'm trying to train Caleb as a teenager with ADHD, ASD, and PTSD. I'm trying to lead him to train Bubba, who isn't house-trained yet, nor crate-trained. I'm trying to get rid of clutter and trash and organize what I want to keep. Eventually, we will get to the point where the shed will get organized and things will move into there, where they belong and in order. I have not been waking up at 0200 anymore. I have not been doing my guided meditations or listening to the audio tracks by Erica Rock or Jana Carrey. I have not had the energy to read the books I collected last year. Things happen so fast, and I feel soooo slow right now. I feel like I can't keep up. I have not been giving myself Reiki treatments. I have been obsessed with paying my dad's final expenses. Now I have to pay for home repairs too. I have not scheduled a time to train 5 people in person to Reiki level 1 yet. I have slowed down a lot.
Pepere is in the hospital, and we don't know when he will be able to come home. I spoke to my mom and then to Granny last night. Granny said she was happy to hear my voice. I was happy to hear hers. I just wanted to let her know that I care and I am here for her.
I want Dona Sharon to stay with us because just her presence is very supportive to me right now. I've got so much going on and very few relationships I can count on. I feel like I am healing faster because she is here. I also am able to give myself permission to rest as needed because she is here, and I'm not the only adult in the house. We share stories every day and talk about all kinds of things. It's good for my mental health. I feel more confident and more of a warrior when she is here because I push harder, which I am proud of. I enjoy being productive. I enjoy sharing meals. I enjoy talking to someone in depth about things. I enjoy remembering my dad.
I'm trying to wean myself from vaping so much too. I bought more e-juice for my e-cigarette which I wasn't intending to do, but at least I bought the brand I like with only 3mg of nicotine versus 6mg of nicotine. This brand does not make me cough like some of the other brands do.
The problem I have with quitting soda is that I drink it to stay awake. Right now, I am so tired too. I told Dona Sharon that if I could invest in my sleep, maybe it be easier to quit soda. Maybe then I wouldn't be exhausted every day and pushing my limits.
I know once I get started walking, I will gain more energy and lose weight at the same time.
Now that my room has been cleaned by the ladies, I am able to rest in there. It makes such a huge difference to me. I am sensitive to a clean house and a clean room.
I wished Mathew, Brian, RJ, and Jeanette a Happy New Years and no one responded to me.
I congratulated Brian on his promotion and he never responded to me about that either.
Christinia is no longer available to chat. It's whatever at this point. I've been alone before and I'm not scared by it. I wish I could talk to her because we always have laughs. I'm not pushing the issue with her. I have no idea what she is going through over there.
I gave Jessica one of Caleb's GED prep books so she would be able to study to take her GED test. I am encouraging her to go to college. Dona Sharon and I have offered to answer any questions she may need help with.
I haven't heard much from Ashley because she has been spending time with her kids for the holidays.
Caleb just got back from walking Bella. I think he is going to take Bubba for a walk next. When I get my walking shoes, I will be able to walk Bella, while he walks Bubba.
I need to water my house plants.
I've been giving thanks before I fall asleep at night. I thank God. I thank my God team which includes Arch-angels, Angels, Ascended Masters (including Yeshua, Mother Mary, Mary Magdalene, and Sarah), Ancestors (including my dad), my higher self, the people in my life who support me, and my pets. Sometimes I go through a list of names in my head and things I am grateful for. Expressing gratitude is so important. It's easy to get lost in the matrix with all these unaware people everywhere. If I want to keep my energetic frequency and vibration high I have to get this into my normal routine. I'm grateful for food in my house. I'm grateful for running water in my house. I'm grateful for running electricity. I'm grateful for technology. I'm grateful for my life lessons. I'm grateful for my growth. I'm grateful to have my own house. I'm grateful to have my van and my car. I'm grateful for Caleb and Dona Sharon living with me. I am grateful for the guidance and protection I receive.
I miss my dad.
Carly is running late this morning. She just text me.
I had a weird dream the night before last. It was about me owning a home and going away for brief time only to come home to complete strangers living in my house and claiming that the house and everything in it belonged to them. It was a group of people claiming this. It was like I walked into a parallel universe because I went to the Town Hall to retrieve my water bill with my name on it to show the police but they did not help me at all. It was strange and frustrating.
We've got to reschedule Bubba and Bella's nail trimming appointments. I found Bubba's medications in my purse. Ugh. I forgot to give them to him. They both need baths.
I'm trying to get Caleb to clean his room. He is resistant and argumentative.
I'm trying to make sure I take care of myself too! There's so much work!
I'm tired already. It's only 0955 and I have only been awake since 0730.
I think the grounding sheet is helping me to relax faster at night. I managed to get up when I was hungry and just eat my chuck roast with veggies and cheese instead of a box of snacks last night. Small improvements make big changes.
Yeah, I need a nap.
Have a blessed day, and thank you for reading!
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