It is now 0131 and I have been awake for at least 30 minutes now. I just completed the week 9 quiz. I forgot to write my discussion post on Thursday, but I wrote it yesterday. Hopefully I won't mess up my grade too much. I woke up hungry and thirsty. I ate ham and cheese and a side of guacamole.
Yesterday was a productive day. That's how I like it to be. I was able to work on my paper and finding my resources to cite. I also did a lot of other things throughout the day too. I was able to call for a refill on Caleb's medications. I also scheduled appointments for both of us to get our flu shots. Caleb and I went to weigh Bubba in at the vet and pick up his medications. We then went to CVS to pick up Caleb's medications, and followed that by trying out the new car wash in the same parking lot as the CVS. The Mazda is clean (on the outside)!
I forgot to eat breakfast and lunch. The thought of food did not even cross my mind. I was so absorbed by the work I was trying to get done. I had the leftover grilled peppers for a snack. I then was able to try the keto meal replacement shakes that were delivered yesterday. I tried the Vanilla Cream Keto Mealshake for dinner because I needed to eat right then. I could not wait for the time it takes to cook a meal, even on the grill. I felt like I needed food right away. It takes ok. It has a bit of an aftertaste, but nothing strong and yucky. I can see myself using it on a regular basis. I bought other brands and flavors too, so I can them as well.
Caleb washed some of his laundry. I made appointments for us to get our DoD/Uniformed Services ID cards renewed at Ft. Bragg. I called my dad to schedule him to go with us.
I received our ballots in the mail yesterday. I still have to register Dona Sharon to vote and request her ballot.
I received an invitation for dinner on Veterans' Day at Oceanview United Methodist Church for both my dad and me.
I bought some really cool nail polish yesterday too. I am staying away from dying my hair, although I thought about it. I still have to inventory my makeup before I decide what to buy.
One of the veterans from Unleash Your Life reached out to me yesterday. I was happy about that.
I listened to September's tele-call by Erica Rock yesterday morning.
I am so thirsty. I am going to go ahead and take my medications because it requires me to drink a lot of my tea. That will cure my thirst! It is only 0153, so it is earlier than I usually take them, but it will be ok. BRB
I feel better now.
Today I have to alternate throughout the day two major tasks: writing my paper and housework. I will begin writing my first draft sometime later today. I want to be sure I have all the resources cited first. I have to get Caleb to clean up the mess Bubba made when he tore up his foam bed. It's Saturday so getting the trash out of the house is important. I need to take a shower and brush my tea-stained teeth. I have been sweating a lot the last few days. I need to make a crockpot meal today. I will probably go with the boneless pork ribs because I bought them first.
Yesterday I made appointments for Bella and Bubba to get their nails trimmed again. I had to cancel the last appointment because of Hurricane Ian.
I am listening to the Erica Rock "Forgiveness" track now.
I only have 3 payments left to Michal for her services. I can't wait to be done. I will have money in January to begin paying down my other debts. I will not be doing any more payment plans for a long time. I still need to figure out how to make money in the condition I am in. I will receive a COLA change in my disability payments after December from both Social Security and the VA. That will help because it is based on the situations we are facing currently with inflation. I should be able to afford groceries without using credit cards in January.
I am listening to "Peace" now.
As I was saying, I have been struggling to buy groceries with the money I have. I am in a position that I am not able to receive food stamps, although I need them. I do not make enough money to buy the things we need without using credit cards. Caleb is growing fast and needs replacement clothing almost every season. I am losing weight and have needed replacement clothing as my body changes too. I am hoping I will be able to cut down on our food waste by using these keto meal replacement shakes instead of buying so many groceries that end up going bad before I can eat them. I have just had so many bad health days when I cannot do much and need bedrest. I am hoping that by getting a good grip on my anxiety that I will be able to control my fibromyalgia flare ups. I am currently taking 2 Hydroxyzine pills in the morning and 2 at night. Sometimes I even take 2 at lunch. I am also taking the CBD+ Stress Support supplement from Swanson Vitamins along with the Calm Concentration supplement. I started taking MCT Pure supplement by Swanson which will hopefully help me stay on my diet. I also started taking 7-Keto LeanGels yesterday. I just know that staying on my prescribed diet is the way to go. I feel better when I am eating the things I am supposed to , in the amounts that I am supposed to. I am still learning. My body has changed for the better and I hope it continues to heal.
I am listening to "Love" now.
I have noticed that when I eat carbs in excess I have an inflammation flare up, or even a fibromyalgia flare up. I also found out the hard way what it is like to have high blood glucose and then take Metformin to bring it down. It doesn't feel good to have high blood glucose at all. The recovery from that is hard, and there is nothing I can do but rest.
I still haven't cleared off the incline trainer. If I can, I will help Caleb do that this weekend. The shed needs to be reorganized. Caleb made a mess of everything in there, and now I can't move the things I need to put in the shed because it's a disaster back there. After my class is over, we will have to fix that, especially since the weather gorgeous now.
I've been saying that I want to start walking for a long time now. I am ready to start this next phase of my health journey. I am ready to tone my body and get that natural stress relief I feel when I walk for a while.
It looks like I am going to have to be the one training Bubba to follow commands. I thought Caleb could do it, and maybe he can help, but it needs to be done. Bubba is growing fast and he is strong. I don't need him to be strong and disobedient.
I am listening to "Love" again. I need that most. I will likely listen to it a few more times.
I never reviewed my lists of things I need to do. I need to do that to make sure I am not forgetting something important.
I am proud that I am getting this class done, but I realize that I cannot continue this program at Capella University. There is no reason for me to pursue this goal right now. I was hoping that I would earn some scholarships from all the essays I submitted, but I didn't. I can't afford to continue on this path. I was going to school to help cover the cost of inflation and make sure I could pay my bills. I would rather not be going to school right now. I can figure this out. I am going to be ok. I am happy that I tried and did not let my fear keep me from applying and trying. I am happy to say that I am a graduate student. I do not see the benefits of continuing this path other than to pursue my doctorate in psychology. I am not even sure why I would need that. I do not plan to go to work. My health is not good enough to hold a job. My plans to write books can be accomplished without a PHd. I need less stress in my life. School is stressful for me. Deadlines bring out the worst in my anxiety, and so does testing.
I messaged Craig over there in South Korea right now. There was news that North Korea launched a missile over Japan last week. I just wanted to check in with him. I haven't heard from him yet, but he doesn't check that account very often either. I'm sure he is fine. He is not a Private and knows his job very well. He is prepared for whatever.
I wonder how Mathew is doing. He must be getting close to retirement soon. It must feel really good to know that 20 years has passed and he made the most of it in the Army. I am proud to be his sister. I wish we were on talking terms right now. I get so stressed out watching the news that I had to stop watching it. I think in terms of how things affect the people I care about, and I care about all people on some level. There's too much hatred in the world.
Meanwhile, I fight my battles alone. I am glad that I have my dad to talk to on a every-few-hours basis. I don't know anyone else I can talk to so frequently without causing me distress. I am glad they found his phone and it is ringing again. I was not happy when I could not reach my dad. I was getting frustrated.
I plan on starting Caleb's training after my class ends. I will take a few days to recover from being in school myself, and then get him started reading one of the banned books. He needs to practice writing. He has a writing disability.
I plan on taking Caleb to the Special Forces and Airborne Museum in Ft. Bragg when we have our appointments nearby. I think he will enjoy that with my dad who is a history buff.
I wish I could contribute more to the Women's Rights groups I belong to. I don't have time, energy, or money to spare, but it's not because I don't think the issues are important.
I need to follow up on that petition paperwork I signed for child support. I need to make sure it was received and then mailed out to Arkansas.
I am about ready to go back to bed. Caleb never gave me a new Victoza pen yesterday liked I asked, so I have to go get one and take my shot. After that I think I will go lay down with Bella until my 0700 alarm rings.
Have a blessed day! Thank you for reading. I feel seen and heard.
No comments:
Post a Comment