Today's prompt is " What is true?" Life is hard.
So, I have a question that occurred to me when I came across an ad on Facebook. At what point does a mental health patient come to the conclusion that it's time to stop taking medication? The ad I came across was for TMS, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation, for depression. It was saying that TMS could change a person's brain function to longer needing medication. I am very interested! I would love to not need to take medication with all the side effects I have to deal with. There's no doubt in my mind that my anti-depressants are at least part of the reason I cannot lose weight, and have sexual dysfunction.
I have been doing much better since about March of this year. I had to recover from some abusive relationships and the damage they did. I have no idea how I would function without medication right now. I have been on a variety of medications since 2013. I would never stop taking my medication without consulting my doctors. SO no worries! I am just curious. How does one come to the point where he or she can say "I am done with these"?
I think I need to refresh my memory and maybe meditate. It took a lot of trial and error to find the right prescriptions to get me to feeling like I'm no longer depressed. Do I have to take these medications for the rest of my life? I was depressed for many years prior to receiving treatment. Prior to enlisting in the Army, I had no health insurance. It was only in the Army that I saw a mental health specialist.
I would love to think that one day I will no longer need to take medications.
It is 5:33 a.m. here now. I received a heat warning for today from the Weather Channel app on my phone. Yesterday, I went out and bought more water in preparation for Tropical Storm/Hurricane Isaias. According to models, it should arrive in my area around Monday morning.
Yesterday, Caleb earned another Hot Wheels car by working on the living room. I only have him do a portion at a time. It helps keep him focused, and the task short. I am building his work ethic. It is working! This was day 2 of working on the living room for a car. I can buy a Hot Wheels car for about $1.07 from Walmart. He spends less than 30 minutes cleaning, so he's making good money for his age. Well, maybe not good money. It's not the money he wants. He is collecting the Hot Wheels cars, and that has a big impact on him.
I hurt my back bending over to shop vac the floor, so I did not get as much done as I would have liked. Still, I got work done. I started to load the dishwasher and hand washed a bunch of dishes. Today I am dedicating to laundry day. I even bought more laundry detergent and dryer sheets. I told Caleb it is going to be laundry and movie day. We are not going anywhere.
Caleb has been trying out fishing at the park. Someone even gave him an old fishing rod. He ended up breaking it, and got really upset. I told him not to worry, we will buy him one from Walmart. He was upset because he said the adult sized fishing rods cost at least $30. I told him, we will find a way. In the meantime, he can earn money by helping me clean the house.
School is just around the corner. I can't believe it is August already, but I am glad. Caleb had the hardest time with boredom. There are no kids on our street, and with COVID-19 no one can play anyway.
Bella is asleep on the bed. Caleb is asleep on the couch. The tv is in sleep mode. I turned the air conditioning thermostat down to cool the house off while the sun is not out. I am drinking my Dew and vaping, like usual. Speaking of which, I am waiting on my shipment of e-juice in the mail. It has been 2 weeks and there are no new updates from USPS since the package arrived in Greensboro. I am getting frustrated because it normally only takes about 5 days to get here. I have already run out of my preferred e-juice, and had to resort to using other brands that I can purchase locally. I hate these because they are not made as well. They damage the coils to my e-cigarette. They make me cough up phlegm. They are about 2 times more expensive for a smaller size bottle. The taste is too much. I just want to yell at the USPS but I'm willing to bet no one will take responsibility.
I have been feeling better since drinking Gatorade during the day. I must have really needed to do that. I drink a ton a drinks all day and all night. I flush out the salts in my body without replacing them. I do not generally eat salt. I have been taking an electrolyte supplement capsule twice daily, but apparently that was not enough. The way I am feeling is so good! I can't believe it! I mean I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't want to overdo it. I feel safer drinking the Gatorade than taking the capsules.
I'm going to have to have Caleb go around the yard and the house and pick up stuff that is out there. He has folding chairs and miscellaneous stuff in the yard that can blow around and cause damage.
Yesterday I put together a new plan to pay off some of my debts. I feel confident that I will succeed. The plan only goes out for next 6 months, so it's a short term plan. I will have to adjust as needed along the way, but hopefully things go as planned.
I need to make a way to put aside savings. Right now, I have a savings account with nothing in it. That's another plan I want to make.
The light is getting brighter outside. It is now 6:19 a.m. here.
Mathew goes in to work on Tuesday and finds out if he will be getting deployed again soon. Nichole is in a state of anxiety, worry, and obsession. I can't blame her. So much of her future depends on the news.
My mom shared a photo of my newborn niece with me the other day! Eric's daughter, Sophia, is so sweet. No pictures have been shared on social media, so I had not seen her yet. The photos were from when she was first born, and I am positive she has grown so much since then.
I don't hear from Sherri much. My nephews are going to grow up not knowing who I am. I try to be available for all my nieces and nephews. They are important to me.
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