5 Year Journal Day 11

     Today's prompt is " Today you lost ____." Today I lost the support of the behavioral specialist who was working with Caleb, from his school. Why? Because today was the last day of the school year. Just when I was getting comfortable with her, and able to ask her for support in specific areas too! Ugh! Just my luck.

     The photos below show the plaque I was awarded upon the end of my time serving in Korea. It reads:
      " For meritorious service as the Supply Clerk for 618th Theater Dental Command, Republic of Korea from May 2008 to August 2010. SPC de Mello's exemplary skills, management acumen, and resourcefulness were critical in enhancing the command's ability to satisfy the dual TDA and MTOE missions. SPC de Mello consistently provided outstanding professional service with steadfast self-reliance in the daily performance of her duties. Most noteworthy was her roll during the 618th Dental Company Area Support (DCAS) fielding of new dental equipment in excess of 3.8 million dollars. These and other outstanding contributions reflect great credit upon her, the 618th DCAS, the 65th Medical Brigade, and the United States Army."

     This is one of my most prized possessions. I am very proud to have earned such praise from the leadership. It came to me as a surprise! I was not aware there was going to be a farewell party. It was awkward for me because 1SGT Randolph was there, and he hated me.
     There are days I really miss being in the Army, and there are days where the reality of my situation really hits home. It could not have been any other way. I wish I could have a career supporting the Army. I was on track to make that happen with my Business Administration: Operations Management , B.S. degree. I fully intended on working in the logistics field after graduation. I was not the same person in 2015 that I was in 2010. So much had happened in between. I just wanted to settle somewhere and have peace.
     By the way, the Mexican food in Korea is awful! LOL We had the farewell party at the hotel on post which hosted a number of restaurants. It had a Mexican food all you can eat buffet on that day. It was not good. Mexican food is one of favorite types of food, and they did not do it justice.
     I feel like  grieve a lot. All the things I can no longer do cause me grief. Watching others go on with their lives, and being successful, gaining rank, making more money, going on vacations, etc. It's like my life ended at graduation day at UNCW. I mean, obviously, I continued to live, but I'm not working towards any goals that those who can work are. I've been told that I should show gratitude for what I have. That doesn't mean I shouldn't want more.
     I want to leave behind a legacy. I don't know how I intend to do that just yet, but I'm working towards it, by writing this blog. I want my life to be inspiring. I want to influence people to achieve greatness.