Tuesday, June 9, 2020

5 Year Journal Day 22

     Today's prompt is "Are you seeking security or adventure?" I am definitely seeking security right now. The uncertainty of COVID-19, the riots and plundering, and the hurricane season are reasons I think of my family's safety and security.

     Today I began walking on my incline trainer. Originally, I was going to walk for 10 minute increments, a total of 3 times a day, but that's not what I ended up doing. I ended walking for 36 minutes non-stop instead. 3 minutes warming up, and 3 minutes cooling down. It felt pretty good. I was popping and cracking, and stretching all over the place. I have not moved that much since going to Walmart last time. Going to Walmart has been my only source of walking any significant distance for any significant amount of time because I usually walk the entire store while shopping. I was able to calculate that I burned approximately 204 calories by using an online incline trainer calorie burning calculator. It doesn't seem like a lot, but anything is helpful. My incline trainer calculates calories burned but does not take into consideration how much I weigh, so it's not accurate. I work a lot harder to move than say a 200lbs. person.
     Starting to walk is very significant to me because I have had to wait so long to get started, and because getting started is the hardest thing for me to do. I had to wait for my custom insoles which include a lift on one side for my plantar fasciitis, which left me unable to stand or walk any distance because of the pain it caused. Also, one leg is "shorter" than the other (the reason for the lift). I had to acclimate to the use of the insoles before committing to walk too. Getting started in a new program is hard because making changes to my routine, in general, is hard. Besides, if I'm already in pain or depressed, I'm highly unlikely to want to do anything but lay on the couch and rest. Also, yesterday, was my weigh-in day, and I gained several more pounds over a week's time. Plus, I had the encouragement of my sister-in-law in the morning to change my ways.
     I have not been keeping up with my healthy diet lately. I have had honey buns, peanut butter crackers, and Velveeta shells and cheese. Caleb had something to do with this. He wants to make sure I eat, even when I am not feeling well. He learned how to make the Velveeta shells and cheese in the microwave. He loves that stuff! I do too, but I shouldn't eat as much as I do. It's a problem. I need to show some restraint. I also had hot dog buns with my hot dogs... I shouldn't be eating carbohydrates.
     I have had to start taking my naproxen regularly again. It is a NSAID, and helps reduce my chronic inflammation I have shown to have. So that's one more medication that I can't stop taking.
     I feel it was because I chose to walk today that I was then able to start taking the trash out of my van later on in the day. It was long overdue. Caleb left food in there, and it stinks to high Heaven! I have to find a way to clean the carpet in there some king of way. Caleb ended up helping me too, which was the right thing to do, seeing as it was ALL his mess.
     I jumpstarted the Volvo. I let it run for awhile, then took it for a short drive. It has a new battery in it, but has been sitting for weeks without being used, so it was drained. Poor Volvo. It doesn't get used like it use to. The air conditioning in it is broken, and the radio no longer wants to turn on. It is a very comfortable ride though. So many memories in that car. It's like time travel when I drive it.
      I wasn't sure if I should, but I bought tickets to take Caleb to see "The Nutcracker" ballet in December. I get updates from the theatre when tickets go on sale. I couldn't resist. I haven't taken Caleb out in so long! I love the holidays. He doesn't know about the tickets yet. It will be a surprise!
      We are waiting on Caleb's journal to arrive in the mail. I bought him one so he could keep his game codes, Army values, and lessons learned all in one place. I am so happy he wants to do that. Anything that gets him writing is awesome. He is so resistant to writing and reading. 
     My photo shoot earrings arrived today and I am so happy! They are definitely what I was looking for, statement earrings. They are going to provide a "pop" of color, as I will be wearing an all white dress. I have yet to figure out what Caleb will wear, but I am working on it. Our last picture together was in white shirts and khaki pants. I want this picture to be somewhat different. I don't think I want us to match, as much as I want us to compliment each other.
     My friend, Rachel, is coming to visit us soon! I am excited as I have not seen her in years! I have to prepare the house for a guest, which is hard work, considering the state of things. Caleb got into my Army closet and took everything out. My stuff is all over the place now. So I have to get him to help me put things the way I want them to be, and secure my stuff in the shed. No more wearing my uniforms.
      Bella is doing well, but I want to invest in a storm vest for her to stay calm during the storms. They are not cheap. She requires that I pick her 65lbs. body up and carry her to the bathtub to be washed, so I have not done that in a while. It's about time I take a deep breath, and use my knees, not my back to lift her heavy, bulky self. 
     I was able to acquire some perfumes and colognes at a highly discounted rate from zulily.com. I have been wanting to try something different since before Christmas, but just wasn't willing to pay the retail price for them. They can be sooo expensive! I bought 2 different scents for myself, and 1 scent mainly for Caleb. I say mainly, because I was curious as to how it smelled (if it would smell good on me) as it is unisex. Caleb is getting to the age where he is getting interested in stuff like that. My little boy is becoming a man.
     Most of my dad and his partner's stuff that was located on my porch since about September last year, is gone. I'm getting my porch back.
     Today, a man tried to tell me that I had to have sex! This was after I told him that I am asexual, and do NOT have sex! WTF?! Who does he think he is? I was getting frustrated texting him, and put the phone down. I ended up blocking him. I don't have time to educate a grown ass man about women's rights, and more importantly, my rights. I'm still upset by it. He tried to tell me that it's ok that I'm asexual and don't have sex, but he is a sexual man... and in his own words " you just gotta." He didn't seem to believe that men and women could be just friends, no sex involved. I don't know where these people come from. SMDH!
     I've been getting a lot of requests on instagram. I am finding that it takes too long to sort them out, and so I will be ignoring them for the foreseeable future.
     I was wanting to do a summer school at home program with Caleb, but I think my time might be better spent in trying to change our home environment and training him how to live with me, so that he will one day be able to take care of himself. I'm not a school teacher, and it's not one of my strengths, so I avoid trying to teach Caleb from books. I have had one home school experience with him prior to the coronavirus outbreak, and it was not good. He is just unwilling to work. So, I want to work on his work ethic, perseverance, and endurance.  I am trying to build a teamwork frame of mind with him, because that is what our home requires. I can't possibly do everything myself, and quite frankly, I shouldn't have to.
   
     Let's take a look at the pictures I found!


     My dad, Caleb, and me at Lowe's one Christmas season. I liked the "Joy" display, and love taking pictures. Southport, NC.


     Caleb wall climbing at a trampoline park in Myrtle Beach, SC. 


     Caleb roller skating at Jelly Beans skating rink. Wilmington, NC.


     Caleb at Disney World, FL. "Where's Perry?"


     Caleb with Mulan at Disney World, FL.


     Caleb at Disney World, FL.


     Carol, my dad, Caleb, and me at a Veterans' dinner at Oceanview United Methodist Church. Oak Island, NC.


     The last time we were together. My mom, Caleb, and me in front of my house. Oak Island, NC. 


     Caleb and me with mohawks! 


     Caleb was chosen to receive a bike, donated by Duke Energy, at Southport Elementary school. Southport, NC.


     I took Caleb to this dinosaur exhibit in Wilmington. He was all about dinosaurs at the time! 


     Caleb and me at one the "Dolphin Run" events held annually at his school, Southport Elementary. He had just finished running his mandatory 30 laps! 


     Business Week at UNCW. That's me. Wilmington, NC.


     Was I ever so young?


     That's what I carried to school every day. I had a camelbak hydration system in it too. I thought it was "high speed". I didn't like having to find parking on campus, so once I parked, I was there for the whole day. I had to pack everything I might need for my classes, to study in between classes, and to eat and drink. Wilmington, NC.


     I picked wildflowers I found on campus one day. UNCW, Wilmington, NC.


     Looks like this might have been a "before workout" picture. Wilmington, NC.


     I was rocking the new Athleta brand clothing that day. I was small enough to fit their clothes and happy to wear them as often as possible. Wilmington. NC.


     At San Felipe Mexican restaurant one day with my friend, Donna. She thought I had lost some weight since the last time she saw me.  Southport, NC.


     The day I brought my beloved Mazda home. Actually it was delivered. I couldn't believe it! The way things worked out for me to be able to get it, was just proof of God's will. Seriously, nothing less than miraculous. Oak Island, NC.


     My good friend, Donna, and me. Oak Island, NC.


     One of my better days. I love my hair in this picture. 

   
     
   

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