It is now 0103 and I just woke up. I came home yesterday afternoon. I went to visit my dad on his birthday to deliver a Jack Fruit. He wanted to see Caleb, meet Bubba, and pet Bella too. We left on Monday morning a lot later than expected. It took a lot for me to get into the shower. I was just not feeling like it. I was dragging ass all morning. I finally took a shower though and then started packing. Caleb packed the car for me. This was the first trip with 2 dogs. It was Bubba's first trip out of town since we brought him home. He doesn't like to get into the car. I listened to 102.7 GNI radio station the whole way there, "Today's hits and yesterday's favorites." I had a good time with my dad. I gave him a happy birthday. We went out to Golden Corral for dinner, and we went to Denny's for breakfast. My dad got to pet the dogs and we talked a lot. I had a lot of stress and anxiety starting from before I took a shower and only ending when I laid down in my own bed when I got home. I am not good at traveling. I don't think I ever was now that I think about it.
I hate the beds there. For the first time in many years I tried sleeping on my stomach. That did feel good. My back was hurting so I needed to roll over.
Caleb brought a stray cat into the room. I don't know what he was thinking. Bella tried to climb a tree to chase a cat when we first got her. She will chase a cat no matter what. The cat jumped up to the curtain pole and sat up there until I held Bella down and told Caleb to take the cat outside and let it go. Apparently the cat came right to him while he was outside. He saw how skinny the cat was and after asking the people who were outside if they were missing a cat, decided to bring it to me. He was sad that the cat was skinny and homeless. There is no way we can keep a cat. It was pretty and all black. Fitting for the season and considering I am a witch.
I'm glad to be home. I did not even look at my computer while I was away. I missed two daily quizzes for extra points. I have a 5 page literary analysis due this week that I haven't really started on.
I am tired. I woke up because I needed a drink and my CPAP was turned off. I just listened to Unlimited Abundance track 17 because I did not write down if I listened to it on Monday morning. I did not do any listening to Erica Rock's audios while I was gone. I woke up a lot during the night but was able to go back to sleep because I slept by the air conditioner and was nice and cold.
Yesterday I told my dad about some of my memories that came to the surface recently while we were on the phone. I told him that once my mom made me "wash my mouth out" with soap because I said a curse word. She also hit me with a wooden spoon on multiple occasions. I told him about how Dennis made Mathew and me go to the bedroom in the apartment in Minnesota and pull our pants down and bend over. My mom stopped him from hitting us, but that memory still lives on. He told me that was abuse. It made him angry to hear these things. He thought we would be safe with our own mother.
I am working on myself and healing my trauma so it is natural for memories to come to the surface.
I am listening to LightBody Activation now. It is wild to disrupt our normal routine to go out of town. It is like I gave myself a break from thinking about the same old things that run through my head on a regular basis. I gave myself a break from performing some of my routines. I did not , for example, bother to brush my hair yesterday morning. I did not listen to my audio files and meditate or pray. I think that gave some room for me to let the memories come up.
I am so tired. I want to get my meditations done though. I am considering whether or not to wait to take my medications. It is only 0153 now.
Caleb stepped on a Copperhead snake last night when he was outside with Bubba. He ended up killing it and was not bitten. It scared him. I told him that he does not belong outside in the dark, and neither do the dogs.
I missed the zoom call for Unleash Your Life on Monday night because I was spending time with my dad on his birthday instead. I missed the call with Coach Brandi on Tuesday morning because I was spending time with my dad while I was there, and had planned on driving when it was time for my appointment. I have an event tonight that I do not know if I will make. It is about fibromyalgia flare-ups.
I finally got Caleb's Focalin refill from the pharmacy on Monday. I guess his psychiatrist's office closes early on Thursday, so I could not get a hold of anyone when I called. His psychiatrist is not in the office on Friday, and so I could not get her "prior approval" done then. Saturday and Sunday the office is closed, so first thing Monday morning I called and tried to get it handled. I was able to pick Caleb's medication up before we went to visit my dad.
I am going to get my meds together while I am listening to this. I'm tired still and will likely go back to bed soon.
I am on week 6 of my class and I can't wait for it to be done. I don't want to do anymore schoolwork. This is exhausting and time-consuming.
My new clothes should be here soon. I think I will send some of it back. I just wanted to be sure I had warm clothes for the Fall and Winter in a size that fits me. I bought a size smaller than what I am currently wearing to prepare for my next size drop. I spent more than I wanted though. I am back to losing weight although I am not maintaining ketosis like I was. I wonder what my A1c is right now. I can't wait to lower my Metformin dosage or get off of it completely.
I am listening to "Love" and will follow it with "Divine Grace" and "Abundance and Prosperity."
I just took my medications and ate some ham and cheese. I don't want to taste those supplements.
I have finished listening to the audio files and am headed back to bed. Be blessed my readers!
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